monday melodies, post number 100

i was deciding if i should save post #100 for something exciting..

but today deserves this post.

~

as the day reached about 11 o' clock,

monsieur N and i had a argument on the subject of a "taxi"{more inside detail, not to be explained}...

it was about as heated as it could get over text.

i called, his phone rang 3 times, then went to voicemail.

both times

i figured he was ignoring my calls.

i slammed my phone on the counter

the touch screen shattered {but luckily still works. i think i've learned my lesson of having my phone in my hands when i'm upset}

the argument died, thank goodness.

and it was back to lovey-dovey.

the reminder made me happy that our arguments normally last no more than 15 minutes.

and i know that any arguments we have in the future are minuscule compared to the eternity we will spend together in love and agreement.

after making up and making out {teehee. just kidding about the making-out part, i just had to say it for giggles}, we got to go swimming with the babies {harleycorn, gavinstein, and ellabella} and play with them.

those cute kiddos make me happy. :]

then after swimming monsieur N mentioned he wants a big family.

i used to want a big family, changed my mind to a medium sized family.

but after he'd mentioned that he wants to have family football games sometimes,

it made me want a big family again too.

for now it's up to 7 kids.

4 boys and 3 girls.

i want them close in age. but not TOO close to where it's diapers for 8 straight years.

~

even though i thought today was going to be completely terrible,

it's turned out to be a fabulous day.

and i am content.

more than content...

pretty stinkin' happy.

:]

~

p.s. i've decided not to do an 18th birthday party.

monsieur N reminded me that every time we're together with our friends,

we feel like outcasts.

but of course, we put ourselves in that situation.

so i'm going to have a girls' night

and go on a spectacular birthday/anniversary date with my man. :]

he is amazing and oh so handsome. :]

post numero 90+9

i,

sarah

elizabeth

love,

sold

my

very

first

dress

at

arizona

bridal

yesterday

therefore

i

got

the

job

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

eeeegads.

do you know how happy i am?

super. happy.

so, in honor of getting the job.. i will celebrate.

how? i don't know.

any suggestions?

~

i'm working on engagement and grad. announcement designs.

hoping to make them look awesome.

but i'm having a poo moment and can't think of what to do.

lame.

i want to take pictures.. but i don't have another photoshoot until next week.

meh.

~
would an 18th "birthday party" be ultra lame?
idunno, but i'm not sure how to celebrate it.

~

i love this photographer. and she's having a workshop the weekend before my birthday..
$975... + $75/night hotel costs. + airline costs. meh. if only....

just lovely.

lovely how i always end up running everyone's errands.

i mean, i don't mind taking our foreign exchange student to the school in the morning and picking him up.

what i don't mind is when my brother asks me to take him places..

places that happen to be farther than i want to take him.

uhmm.. isn't he supposed to be grounded?

~

lovely how i'm being bashed on now.

moody? pshhh.. no. it's called "being a girl"

having standards? that's a problem?

yeah. that's right.

stick that in your juice box and suck it.

~

lovely how throwing up all morning and not being able to walk around and enjoy the fresh air all day isn't more important than basketball.

at least that's what it felt like at the time.

i guess i'm over it though.

~

lovely how feist's "mushaboom" can do the trick.

"Old dirt road,
(mushaboom, mushaboom)
knee deep snow
(mushaboom, mushaboom)
Watching the fire as we grow (mushaboom, mushaboom)
o-o-o-o-old"

~

lovely how i'm still smiling in spite of people being rude faces.

mhmm. :]

~

my "try out" at AZ bridal is tomorrow.

basically i'll watch tami for 45 minutes,

then go on my own and try to sell a dress to a happy bride.

wish me luck.

~

see more of this photoshoot here

i can't contain myself!

in 3 more posts, i will be hitting my 100th post.

isn't that supposed to be exciting?

it doesn't sound like it's that big of a deal, i've seen someone with over 800 posts.

pshhh. big deal.

~

GUESS WHAT!

this girl {me} might get a job. {not just might. MOST LIKELY}

i applied at arizona bridal and they were so excited {at least tami was} to see me and have me apply there!

which is a good sign.

when i got home, not even an hour after i talked to tami,

she called and said deidra wanted to set up an interview for monday at 11.

wish me luck and pray i get the job! :]

I'M SO EXCITED! AHHH!!!

sad thing is.. it would mean goodbye to my saturdays,

but it's okay, because who wouldn't want to be in a store with a gazillion wedding dresses and a bunch of happy brides? :]

however, it means photoshoots will not be available on saturdays if i get the job.

unless if my shifts work out well with the light of the sun.

~

nic's grandparents turned 80 and their birthday party is today.

it will be adorable.

cute decor and sweet people.

and yummy cake {i got to test it}

 :]

~

i hope everyone is having a happy saturday.

i sure am. :]

every word you say, i think i should write down.

monsieur.N and i tried having a movie marathon tonight.. we got through two movies.

but we teased and tickled each other through both movies.

eventually it came down to sitting on the floor and writing cheesy contracts.

basically saying "i hereby solemnly swear to love you forever and ever"

yeah. cheesy. but he makes me smile. :]

we compromised on movies, and watched a war movie and a chick flik.

hello Dear John.

you are a lovely movie, and i'm sure you make a better book.

so after the darling movie, i must read the book and make sure i get the real thing.

i need to pick up on reading in general. i haven't read a book in forever

{thank you hannah peterson for listing a few new books :] }

i went job hunting today at santan village.

romy is hiring. i was super excited to hear those words.

because they have cute clothes.

also american eagle and a couple other stores.

a little birdie told me that AZ Bridal is low on their staff..

SO... i plan on applying tomorrow. {and i've got a head start because of the modest prom dress fashion show}

squee! {thank you perla ;] }

it is time for me to head off to bed.

it is now 1:30

goodnight.

here's a couple pictures just to tickle your fancy.

everything's more interesting with pictures:

possible future bedrooms:

possible bathrooms:

possible kitchens:

future offices:

future living room:

future anything:

{i want this front entry way}

i want a barn.. with lots of horses.

woah.. sorry.. went a little picture crazy. :]

dr. seuss is my best friend.

saguaro lake tomorrow and tuesday.

debating on whether to take my camera or not.

most likely will.

can't wait to get in the water and burn and look like a to.mah.to and ski.

oh yeah. and hang out with that cute boy i like to call my future husband.

~

one thought:

i thought i left all this dang drama behind in the hell.hole

two thought:

leave me the frick alone.

red thought:

get out of my head you creeper.

blue thought:

stop lying to me.

~

i'm having troubling thoughts. not just the dr. seuss ones above.

ones that are making me want to hurl.

but i don't want to talk about them.....

~

i don't know what i want anymore.

roadtrip playlist complete.

things i need to do starting on the 14th:

[one]: go to westwood, get my transcripts, return honor's stole.

[two]:  take transcripts to MCC.

[three]: get my room set up.

[four]: finish enrolling in classes.

[five]: apply for scholarships.

[six]: look for jobs at the san tan village mall, and fiesta mall.

[seven]: party with my friends. :]

~

can i say, that even though i make brownies out of a box most of the time, they are the dang best brownies

ever.

want to know why?

because i bake it with love. mhmm.

yes, pun intended.

i also make the best turtle brownies around {from scratch. it's like candy}.

{my junior english teacher also said that her husband thinks they taste just like a bakery}

i used to dream of opening up my own bakery.

i make awesome cheesecake, tartes, brownies, etc.

and i would love to share some of the de.lish happiness with the community.

BUT bakeries are very hard to keep in business.

therefore, i stick to photography.

because it's my numero.uno love.

besides monsieur.N, duh. :]

~

i think we're destined to not go to lake powell this summer..

first, the boat we were going to use was going to cost a couple K's to get fixed.

second, we weren't sure if we'd be able to borrow one from someone. {but we were able to borrow monsieur.N's family's boat}

now, for third, our suburban broke down in payson and we're not sure how much it will cost.

possibly over 1K?

we don't know.

so we might just go to roosevelt lake.

woop.dee.doo.

it's not as exciting.. but eh, it's a lake.

well, whatever happens, it's what's meant to be.

even if it isn't as fun.

at least i get to see my brother, his adorable soon to be wife, and her kiddos.

they are all so amazing. i love them. and i get to see my new nephew. :]

monsieur.N arrives in about 18 hours.

am i excited?

JUST A WHOLE FREAKING LOT!

am i pathetic?

heck.to.the.yes.

one more day

up all night long with a moaning almost toddler because he's still teething.

every time i laid back down after getting him situated with his sippy-cup and a pacifier,

he'd start crying again.

finally i left the room at 6am because the only thing to do is ignore him.

and what do you know? once i come out here, he stops crying....

it's now 6:30am.

today will be a long day.

monsieur.N flies in with his mom tomorrow.

it's been 3 weeks.

and tomorrow will feel like heaven.

then i see my family on friday night.

it's been a month.

then i see my extended family on my dad's side {who i adore like crazy}on saturday.

it's been 4 months.

we're going to lake powell. it's one of my favorite places to be.

other than in monsieur.N's arms. :P

i thought i was going to miss out on EVERYTHING happening back home..

first, my family moved the same week i moved to california.

second, my grandma passed away last week and i didn't get to go to her funeral in utah.

third, i thought i was going to miss going to lake powell..

BUT luckily enough we're moving back the day before my family goes.

monsieur.N gets to go with us to the lake, even though my parents said they'd never let me bring a guy with until i was 18.

hallelujah!

i'm so happy he gets to meet my dad's side of the family before he goes on his mission. :]

so anywho.. here's some pictures from the 4th of july:

i know i can't, but honestly, won't someone stop this train.

can i please burn all rated R movies?
seriously.. life is so much better without them.
did you know the movie Shutter Island has 19 F words and a scene with naked men in a cell?
{i've been ignoring the movie and listening to my ipod with uplifting music and happened to look up during that scene. i want to cry}
you get to see a whole naked man's front side...
along with a million scenes of blood and gore.
isn't that wonderful???
NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's ridiculous.
it makes me so pissed off.
{i'm sorry if you watch rated R movies and enjoy them.. i'm not trying to offend you, but the movies make me sad. all i'm saying}
today has just been.. very emotional.
{for one thing, mother nature gave me a "gift" today. she can go die. and i've just been home sick and frustrated. and i've had someone nagging me for something i refuse to do.}
so i feel like i'm going to burst into tears right now, because i'm sad that everyone in this world does not know of the truth of Christ and that they can live happily without even the simple things in their lives that tear them down, little by little.

today i've realized that i am SOOOOOO thankful for the gospel and all of the teachings.
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints IS a Christian church.
it teaches us to be HAPPY. and to live happy lives, in spite of difficulties that come our way.
our church is founded on Christian beliefs, but the prophets have given us guidance to be even more happy, healthy, and well rounded.

today nic's sister asked me "so do you find it harder to live the rules now that you're out of the house and without your parents?"
and i said "no, i think it's kind of easier because i get can do it on my own, but some things are harder, like being modest. i've never had short shorts before"
and i feel like i already want to get rid of them.
they are uncomfortable and way too revealing. i feel like my butt will fall out the bottom. my rule for myself that i just made is that i'm only allowed to wear them to go swimming.

okay. so now i've been rambling.. i just wanted to get my feelings out before i forget to write in my actual journal for the next month.. haha. :]

so... if you kept reading through this nonsense, i owe you brownies.
just leave a comment. :]
just kidding. :P
i'm feeling slightly better though. so that's all that matters
goodbye ranting rampage.

negative.affirmitive.negative

thoughts running through my head:

i'm annoyed

go away

freaking text me

shut up

scared

nervous

i'm a jerk

i'm so dumb

i made stupid choices

i suck at life

no i don't suck at life

will i be able to find a normal job before college?

will things work out the way i hope they will?

i'm going to cry

i can't cry.. too embarrassing.

i miss him

i've done better for the last 2 & 1/2 weeks than i though i would have.

maybe his mission won't be too bad..

no... i'm going to die while he's on his mission.

this is stupid.

i need to stop feeling bad about myself.

think positive..

positive.

positive.

happy.

smile.

meh.....

SO much more on my mind.. but you don't want to hear it.

most of it's negative.

just.be.happy.

keep.calm.carry.on

countdown

in:

 

2 days: 4th of July

5 days!!!!: bake brownies & monsieur.N and his mom fly here

1 week: drive back to arizona

1 week & 1 day: go to lake powell with nic and my family

1 week & 6 days: get my hair done

1 month & 20 days : classes start

2 months & 18 days: i turn 18!!

4 months & 18 days: monsieur.N turns 19! {about the time for him to leave on his MISSION!! AHHHH!}

can you tell i'm excited?