Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Rough Times

Wow, the last week has been hectic!

So I was grounded from going to prom, but last Saturday my dad and I went on a daddy daughter date. We went to go see Monsters Vs. Aliens (Which was stinking cute! Really. It was awesome and hilarous! :] ) and on the way back I was talking about a way I would be able to go to prom. We came up with me having to do the dishes and make dinner every night until prom.... Woohoo... but the trick was getting my mom to agree to this.. She expects me to never see Nic again. Which is never going to happen because I love him too much.

So we talked to my mom about it... She almost said no.. but she decided to let it work! Another condition is that my parents have to talk to his parents.. which will be awkward, but they're letting us go on a triple date with all of us and we'll all talk about it there so it won't be so awkward. Anyways.. So I did the dishes twice on Sunday, and cleaned the entire kitchen and part of the family room. I'm trying to do more than I have to so I can make my parents happy. But last night I made turtle brownies.. it took me about 4 hours total. But it's for a service learning project we're doing for our english class. I finished at 10, then had to do the dishes. So I did the dishes until 11. Then I still had to do my homework.. Which I did, but towards the last few problems I kept falling asleep, but whenever I'd try to do the problem, I'd fall asleep again. So that whole night REALLY stressed me out.

The week came and went... We were assigned in our english class to read a novel of our choice and do a million different assignments on it... I chose Little Women. Little did I know that this 500 page novel and all the assignments to go along with it had to be completed in 2 weeks. So I'm freaking out about it because I never have time to read with all the dish washing and dinner making I have to do. Although, my mother has been kind and hasn't required me to make dinner for the past couple nights, mostly because it's the weekend.

Yesterday Nic was trying to get me out of my house and hang out with my friends so I could stop moping and do something fun.. But because I got out of the house, my night went worse than it would've been if I'd stayed home. I went to go do some grocery shopping for my mom. I got all the stuff she needed, rang up everything with the cashier... ran the debit card through the machine.... DENIED. What the heck...? I called my mom. She checked the account online... There was no reason it shouldn't have worked. There was money in the account.. but still no approval from the machine. So they sent me up to Customer Service with my stuff and the reciept for the amount it was. My dad was supposed to be on his way... I called 15 minutes later... My dad's car was dead... I called 30 minutes later.. still dead. I called 10 minutes later.. He'd got it working and was on his way. He got there and paid with cash. We left with my face a tear stained mess, silence, and melted ice cream.

And the whole time Nic was telling me to get out of the house, I was thinking he might have been planning to ask me to prom while I was gone (because he still hasn't officially asked) which is the only reason why I went-- but no.. in the middle of shopping he said he was at Kino's performance of the play Annie and had to stop texting. GREAT! So I was already upset by him "forcing" me out of the house. Then the denial happened and I was even more angry with him for making me do something. And I couldn't even talk to him because he was in the play.. So I got home after 1 hour and 10 minutes waiting.. I told him I wanted to call him when he was able to.. So I sat around thinking I would get my phone call.. but no. So I asked him if I could talk to him.. *He didn't feel like it* EVEN MORE GREAT NEWS! NOT! I was so upset and started crying till it felt like sobbing could do no good for me anymore. Yes it sounds over-dramatic.. but I have some weird problem with me, where I get really depressed for no reason. Like really... I get so depressed sometimes that I wish I would die already. Then the next day I'm fine. Which is how it is right now. I'm perfectly happy.. So when he said that he didn't feel like talking, I thought something was wrong with me and how could I be such an awful girlfriend and he doesn't love me anymore and stuff like that. Then he apologized for making me upset and he helped me feel better. So I went to bed happy.

I woke up this morning and everything was great. I curled my hair and looked all cute for church. I went to church and learned some amazing things, mostly in Young Womens. That's where I learn the most. It's easier to focus and the lessons are always AMAZING! Thanks to Sis. Peterson, Sis. Huish, and Sis. Payne. They're the best people I know and they're my heroes. Especially Sis. Peterson. She knows a lot about what I'm going through and helps me get through it. I definitely owe her a lot for everything she does!
On the way home from church though my mom started lecturing about how her children settle for less... I didn't enjoy that... Most definitely not. I'm not "settling" I guess I am in a way... But I don't know how to explain it... Just know that i'm NOT settling.

Okay, so I know this is a lot of information... So I'll leave it with this:

I'm happy now and life is getting better.
The most important thing I learned today is that people change, not always in a good way, but hopefully for the better. I also learned that I need to have patience with Nic. and my older siblings. I keep pushing the gospel on Nic (and my mom and I are kind of doing the same with my older siblings) and trying to cram it down his throat and I'm expecting too much from him, and today Sis. Peterson said that guys aren't as spiritually in-tune as girls are, so they take more time to mature and become a better person, and most of the time they don't take the gospel as seriously when they're younger.. So that made me think about how he is feeling with me being so pushy.. and from now on, I will be patient.

Okay, really.. I will stop talking now... haha. :]

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